It Means A Lot To Me.

I'm happy to write this out loud, I want you to know, you are the one who can completely turn my world around. I would love to share with you the things that I've never shared with others. Everytime when something wonderful happens, I could never be patient to tell you about it. I truly believe, you are not embarrassed to cry with me when I'm hurting or laugh with me when I'm making a fool of myself. You never hurt my feelings or make me feel like I'm not good enough, but you always build me up and show me the things about myself that make me special and even beautiful. I can be myself and not worry about what you think of me because I believe you love me for who I am.

26th July 2011

What is it all about? The date, 26th July is the day when God sent me to this world and it's also the day when my mom suffered the pain. I guess you all know what I'm talking about, simple and straight - It's My Birthday!

I bet many people will ask, when is my birthday actually? 25th or 26th? I admit, I have tried to fool my friends. On my facebook profile, I listed there my birthday is on 25th but it's actually the next day. I was too bored, that's why. When people are bored, they start to think of something really weird, something that doesn't make sense. I do apologize if I've made anyone of you angry.

Honestly, I never thought anyone would remember my birthday. I was so touched when my bunch of lovely brothers and sisters, they celebrated my birthday with me. I know, you guys have tried so hard to give me surprises and seriously you guys did. I got tricked by you guys, I got fooled by you guys, I got splashed by you guys and thank you guys, I got presents from you guys.

On that day, I got shocked three times! It's THREE TIMES!!! Seriously, my heart was almost out from my chest. I know, you guys were happy seeing me hopping and screaming. Three times, the same reaction from me hopping and screaming. I don't know where should I hide my face because my neighbours saw that too.

Once again, THANK YOU VERY MUCH TO ALL OF YOU! YOU GUYS HAVE GIVEN ME THE BEST BIRTHDAY SURPRISES EVER, IT'S MEMORABLE AND I'LL NEVER FORGET! I LOVE YOU GUYS, Muackzzz~♥

Stupid Network Connection!

I was disconnected from the world for 5 days. Today, finally the internet connection is working. The first thing I'm gonna post is about 26th July 2011, an important day for me. I will never forget that day, every minute, every second, every hour of the day.

I'll tell you all about it in my next post, so stay tuned!

AM I a Bad Person?

I got few questions to all the people who know me.

Please answer me in an honest way.

I just want to know how you people think of me.

Am I a bad person?

What are my bad attitudes?

Am I annoying?

Did I ever make you angry?

Am I an eyesore to you?

Do you wish that I'm dead?

Kick Off to a New Semester!

Wow, I can't believe a new semester is starting already. This is an exciting time because at the beginning of this new semester, I have the opportunity to cut loose some of the bad habits I had in the past. No more social networking stuff during weekdays but a little excuse for me to have a little bit of chitchatting on MSN and my phone. The most important thing and it's markable - when there's time to study, remember the best thing to do is STUDY STUDY STUDY. Revise all the lecture notes and anything that I don't understand, please feel free to ask.

I should push myself to it, I know I can do it!

WAKE UP AARON JONAH,

IT'S TIME TO FIGHT!

Don't Be Afraid.

"Being afraid to get close to someone, because someday they might leave you."
Why are people afraid to love? I'm not just talking about the love as in love, but also the love between friends. I believe every people are afraid of being abandoned.

I understand the situation, where we as humans all want to be loved, want to be touched, want to have that closeness. But we are scared, we scared to open our hearts to let someone in, because we are sensitive to the fact that we could loose them.

All these fear are just the matter of toughness. We have to take the chance, be tough to take the risk, don't think of the negative side all the time. We just have to take that leap and jump right into that special someone's heart.

Speak It Out.

I'm happy because you're willing to share your feelings with me. I believe I'm not the simply random friend whom you picked to share your feelings with. You share your negative feelings with me because you trust me. Talk about trust, a trusted friend is someone who will not depart amid your sorrow and pain and who will help when you are down and out. I will always be there for you whenever you need me. Remember, you're not alone.

Bow and Sorry.

I hope everyone would accept my apology. All the time I was always thinking about myself, I never care how other people feel. I always thought that is the best way of solving the problem, but actually it isn't. I'm actually fooling myself and other people as well. This shows that I'm the stingy and hypocrite types of person. I bow to say sorry, I hope you people can forgive me.

I promise. I will never say anything like that again and I will never hurt the people that I love because if you love someone truly, you will never hurt them. ♥

I Wish

I wish everyone could forget about me and stay happy forever.

Stay Here Forever.

I HAVE MADE MY FINAL DECISION, I WON'T BE GOING TO PERTH NEXT YEAR!

After all, maybe it's not necessary for me to continue my study abroad. I've been thinking about this after I know my results. I tried to talk to my mom this evening, I told her my feelings. Then I mentioned about next year, I said I don't wanna go to Perth. Without any reason, I just don't wanna go anywhere. I know she wants me to get a more liberated study abroad experience so she wants me to go overseas. I really feel sorry for my parents because I feel like I'm useless, I couldn't be their 'dream son'.

I Failed My Finals

I thought I'll share this with the rest of the world because it will help me let some steam out and hopefully help with my temporary depression phase like I'm going through, same goes to those who also failed and are in the same boat as me.

I decided to roll up my sleeves and study hard for the next coming units. I'm gonna be serious in my studies and by serious I mean a good two hours a day and considerable time going through the slides and tutorial questions whenever I have the time to do so. By serious I mean giving up daily dinner gatherings with my friends, film series, movies and the most important thing - NO FACEBOOK!

To be honest, I still can't believe I failed this unit. I still remember I walked out of the exam hall the day of the exam with a smile on my face. For some reason, I believed I passed. Who knows, it turns out to be completely different. Is it my problem or the lecturer's problem?

Now, picture this with me. Yesterday was the big day, the day of results. The results were supposed to be out at 12AM midnight, the same day afternoon my friend told me there is a prediction way of knowing your results whether it's passed or not. I followed the steps and I got into the web. It was so nerve-wracking while browsing the page. Once the page showed, I saw I failed, it really hit me hard. Miserably.

I was with my brother, he is the first person who get to know my bad news. Whenever I feel depressed, he will always be there for me. Sometimes I do really think, maybe I shouldn't always share out my bad feelings. I have told seven people that I failed the same day evening.

My mom was the last person who get to know about my results. Via SMS I told her I failed one unit. She replied to my text, I will never forget what is the text about. She said, "No matter what, you are still my son. Mom loves you." I got this heart touching feeling whenever my mom says this to me and there will be tears coming out from my eyes. I feel ashamed of myself because I let my parents down and those who love me and who care about me. I wish there is someone who is willing to grab a knife and stab it through my heart or someone who is willing to slap me and scold me like I am a stupid idiot.

To add insult to injury, everybody I know they are either passed or they get to sit for supplementary. I was never exactly the nerd at school or university for the matter, barely even aced any exam. I'm the typical average student. Someone who would always do the bare minimum and will pass with an average of 50+ marks.

The good news is, that I learned my weak points, those areas that I was weak in. "FAILURE IS AN EVENT, NEVER A PERSON." I kinda love this phrase, it's introduced by KENT LEE MAN KIT. I try hard not to keep the word failure running in my head, when you see failure as a learning event, not a destination, it makes you smarter and faster. Hopefully.

Failing. Grappling. Moving on. Living More Wisely. Yes, it's not the end of the world!

By,
ronRon